Gardeners are hard to come by, so Parisians tend to employ a man with a bloody great JCB (fitted with a slashing device) to take his place; and why not!
It makes short work of lightly trimming the Hazel Nut trees,
And even shorter work of gently pruning the Fig trees.
OK, so he's a wee bit messy, but the muggins next-door neighbour will clear up everything that falls (or is ejected) over into his vegetable garden (Haddock's). And the rest? Well, that can just bloody well stay there until it disappears naturally.
Voila! Parisian Pre-Winter gardening complete in just over a couple of hours.
I leave the house for half the fucking morning, and return to find all this. I fucking despair!
(It's much worse than it looks in the pictures)