Saturday 21 November 2015

Gardening (Parisian style).



Gardeners are hard to come by, so Parisians tend to employ a man with a bloody great JCB (fitted with a slashing device) to take his place; and why not! 


It makes short work of lightly trimming the Hazel Nut trees,


And even shorter work of gently pruning the Fig trees.

OK, so he's a wee bit messy, but the muggins next-door neighbour will clear up everything that falls (or is ejected) over into his vegetable garden (Haddock's). And the rest? Well, that can just bloody well stay there until it disappears naturally.

Voila! Parisian Pre-Winter gardening complete in just over a couple of hours.

I leave the house for half the fucking morning, and return to find all this. I fucking despair!

(It's much worse than it looks in the pictures)



46 comments:

  1. I presume this is your neighbour. What a scene of devastation. I hate to see hedgerows cut with a flail - it is just so savage.

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    1. And what a bloody mess too; it's unbelievable.

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  2. Barbarians !
    A quiet word perhaps? It's awful when city folk bring their big town ways to the country - they just have no idea. No doubt they will regale their city friends with tales of their fast track pruning ! Very useful for a window box !

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    1. I take a reasonable pride in my surroundings, and try to keep things looking nice not only for us but for everyone else. When we first bought our house, our lovely neighbours did likewise, and it was all very pleasant. Unfortunately we now have different neighbours who couldn't care less.

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  3. Hmmmmm.....not quite the topiary at Athelhampton House. I think the most horrible thing to see are the JCB tracks, especially in such a setting.

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    1. The tracks are on my land too, which I kept mowed. You should see the state of his lawn!

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  4. Stop making such a fuss. It will all be fine. Come the spring it will be the best hedge you ever saw and the grass will grow back in the ruts, chuck a bit of soil in if they are really bad.

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    1. Picture 3 shows a footpath that is now strewn with branches etc; I can't even walk there any more. If you have a few spare minutes maybe you'd like to help move it all.

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    2. A bit of raking will keep you warm.

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    3. It's raining; I'm staying indoors.

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    4. That's Rachel's farming background talking.

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    5. It's how they cut their own hedges, although in Norfolk I'm not sure if they had any...

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    6. P makes his living from it. His hedges are beautifully cut and much admired especially in the Spring when they start growing again.

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    7. Long way to come in a tractor.

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  5. We have similar hassle from our neighbours. There is an obsession to 'tidy' everything.!Habitats destroyed in hours no sensitivity. Also something about playing with big boys toys that I don't understand!

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    1. I spend hours trying to look after nature, and suddenly it's all undone. Makes me mad!

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  6. Oh dear, that must have made you feel quite cross I would think especially because you try so hard to keep things tidy. We don't have any close neighbours so do not have this problem, but when the verge cutting man comes along with his big 'hacking away at everything machine' it does leave our hedges looking mangled up.

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    1. Overnight wind has brought down more large branches into Haddock's, and I've just been chucking them all back onto his (what used to be a) lawn.

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  7. Replies
    1. Certain things make me mad!And when I'm mad.....

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  8. Oh dear Cro. Can't you ask them politely to clear it up\/
    \if not I suggest you sit down with a cup or glass of your favourite tipple and relax.

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    Replies
    1. I'm trying to be calm, but the mud and mess is amazing.

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  9. I've been trying to think of a suitable revenge for you to carry out, but I'm feeling too unwell to have good ideas. So back to sleep for me. Sorry about the mess!

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    Replies
    1. So, you have got that cold you were worrying about. Hope you feel better soon.

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  10. Argh! It makes my blood boil.
    It leaves everything looking scarred. All in the name of 'clean an tidy' . Because you know, falling leaves etc.are dirty to these kind of people.
    Fortunately the vegetation will recover, but in the meantime they leave you with an unsightly hatchet job.

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    Replies
    1. One minute everything looks natural and tidy; the next as if a whirlwind has just passed through.

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  11. Get your wife to ring his wife ( lots of Gallic tears and outrage ....having tended the plot on her ruined hands and knees for so many many years ....wails and blather) It will work...he will be back to clean up the mess.
    Just as well you have never lived in rural Oz....firstly you would probably have burst a blood vessel and be pushing up daisies by now but you would have learnt some fantastic mind shattering swearing:)

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    Replies
    1. My daughter-in-law is going for tea this afternoon, I've told her to ask questions.

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    2. She didn't go; couldn't stand the idea.

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  12. Guess they value the gorgeous rock walls more than the vegetation, but, that is the most inconsiderate thing I've heard. I'd be pounding on their door demanding a clean up on my side of the fence. Put it this way first, "I'm sure you had no idea of the damage your hire did on my property!" If no resolution then pile it all on his side and put a tire on top and set fire to the mess when the wind is blowing toward his house. Bet he'll be more careful next time.

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    1. I've been throwing it back over the wall. He'll have to clear that up, or abandon his lawn.

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  13. Maybe they want you to weave them a basket for Christmas. It was their subtle hint. If you do, don't forget to add the doggy droppings for a beautiful ornamentation, complete with mistletoe stuck in the middle. Okay, that's bad. Don't actually do that, Cro.

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    1. I can think of a few other things too, to put in that basket.

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  14. I get upset when the neighbor cuts the hedge and it all falls in my veg garden, this is just slash and strip. I'd be upset, and Mr B would be getting an ear full.

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    1. You should have seen what landed in MY veg garden; loads of it; big branches all over the place. Not happy.

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  15. Is this the same horse neglecting neighbour with the ugly orange fence? Criminey.

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  16. What a mess! Your neighbors seem to be a self-centered bunch who don't care how their actions affect the people around them.

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  17. They flail the hedgerows around here too. To a degree I understand it as it can be done by one person and no-one could afford to pay several men with cutters and chain saws to do the job. However, it looks awful, but at least they clear up after temselves

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    1. I think my neighbour has cleared up a bit around his house, but of course he won't bother further down the lane.

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  18. sorry about it. the last two years the same thing has been done to the euonymous at the parish house. it is idiotic and opens the way for plant diseases as well as looks like hell. they also sprayed roundup poison on my grape vine. that is 2 vines gone. i despair of ever getting a grape as i am not getting younger and a grape is at least a 5 year proposition.
    but people are stupid everywhere. it is just a miracle that there is any worthwhile civilization anywhere on the planet.

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    Replies
    1. It's all a matter of education, Deborah. Some people are never taught to be respectful of others.

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